Hi. How are you? May this post reaches you while you are in the best state and health.
My last post was in 2020. Now it is the year 2022. An obvious 2-year-gap. Enough to make anyone who's reading this wonder about what could happen in that 2-year duration causing the author to pause writing. (As If I ever had any audience xD)
But for real, I've been blogging for years. Since I was in my early adolescent years. When blogging became a trend, I was among the earliest clueless kid who wanted to jump on the bandwagon until her blog became a hit but then got hacked :(. Maybe I was not meant to be famous. Not yet.
Sometimes I got this silly thought of having a mysterious and handsome male silent reader that has been an audience of mine since 8 years ago. He would read what I wrote, feel what I expressed, and when fate brought us together, we would be madly in love with each other and live together happily ever after. Sounds like Disney's movie isn't it? As if love was this easy.
Let me take you to a little bit of throwback since I skipped writing a lot. Forgive me, still working for firm consistency. Everything really went well for me the least. I lost a few kgs, got the best results for my foundation, and spent 2020 Ramadhan and Syawal with my family. But then I can't apply for COP. I was devastated. I felt useless. I felt bad. I wanted that course but I was late. I missed the chance but I tried again. I called here and there to ask if I still had the chance. But sadly no. With a heavy heart, I got into the Bachelor of Audiology (Hons). I didn't know what I was learning. I lied here and there when they ask why I wanted that course. Honestly, I didn't want it. But obviously, I wouldn't say it that way cs they'll be asking why. I hate getting attention the most. To me, everything was blurry heavy shit. But I knew I can't quit. As I tried to breathe, I lost my one and only grandma who I took care of. 2020 was one hell of a ride, I must say.
I was not being myself during the whole pandemic. I got the worst results for 2 freaking semesters cs I obviously didn't study hard. But I live with academic validation so I can't help but associate my worth with my academic achievement. There is nothing I can be proud of myself. Not a single thing.
I thank Allah for giving me a very supportive and helpful coursemate. I would not survive audiology without them. Maybe it is too early to say this since I have not graduated but hey, gratitude has no timing. When the MCO was lifted and going back to campus became compulsory, I got my life back. I felt alive on the inside. Very different from 2020. 2021 was a healing year for me. Alhamdulillah.
Fast forward to now, I am 20 years 7 months 7 days old. I got into Bachelor of Audiology (Hons), currently in my 4th semester. Time really flies that fast. I have improved in a lot of things, and I am so proud of myself today. Not gonna lie that I am still lacking in some parts, but a small improvement is still worth celebrating don't you think <3
This post is unintentionally long. If you accidentally come across to this post, I pray that your life only fills with love, success, and blessings from the Almighty. May every hardship that you face be eased and eventually brings you the sweetest thing in life. Till next time :)
